There are times when my counsellor looks at me, raises an eyebrow, and struggles to sigh, grin, and stay composed all at the same time. It usually happens when I’ve been putting other people’s needs ahead of my own for an extended period of time, and I’m looking a bit ragged around the edges.
The last week or so has been one of those rollercoaster events, coupled with overtime at the library and an extra influx of articles, so suffice to say I’m enjoying a weekend of doing not much and curling up with Lady M.
The recent troubles arose out of events in Lady G’s life (she who has also been dubbed Lady M-to-be by the current and ex-Lady Ms. Pay attention, there may be a test later). Domestic life in her household has not been going smoothly, and all of us in her social circle have been increasingly concerned by the behaviours of her partner – especially those of us who have been in emotionally abusive relationships in the past.
This came to a head last Sunday when some of us were down the pub. I received a message from Lady G that her partner had accused her of being an alcoholic, and that none of her friends liked her when she was drunk.
Having supported people battling with drugs and alcohol, I can tell you categorically right now that she is not an alcoholic.
I showed the message to the assembled throng, and my favourite Valkyries (Ladies M and P) rose from our game of Cards Against Humanity, grabbed the car keys, and drove round to Lady G’s house to
kidnap rescue her for the afternoon. A very pleasant afternoon and evening then followed, as we reinforced our support, love, friendship, and care for her while continuing the game.
We dropped her home later, and stayed on standby to rescue her if things turned nasty. She ended up coming over to the flat the next day and staying over. A number of in-jokes based on comments made in arguments have now gained currency in our group, and while she is back home and her partner pretending nothing has happened, she is thinking things through.
This of course is the frustration any of us feel when we see someone in a bad situation, where they are being acidicly undermined and made to lose their self confidence. The urge to leap in and rescue someone can feel overwhelming, but the only person who can resolve things is Lady G herself.
It is hard to watch, but we are all supporting her with kind words, jokes, and counter arguments to what she is being told by her partner. How will things turn out? Well that depends on what makes Lady G happy I guess.