Struggling With Motivation

I think if this year has taught me anything, it’s that there can always be something else that goes wrong, or another wrinkle in the story. 

I can be talking on the macro socio-political stage or on the most personal levels of self-set goals, and you can bet that I will get an answer to my perennial question when starting a new course of action:
What’s the worst that could happen?

Now I don’t for one moment believe that the universe actually takes that statement as a challenge; it just feels like it. I just don’t let it stop me.

What has happened though is that my writing has taken a bit of a back seat recently. I’ve preferred instead to sketch and doodle. Quite a few of these I’ve put up on Instagram or Twitter, and links should appear on the Twit-Feed bit on the bottom right of this page when I do.

The appeal has been that it’s been more free-form, and hasn’t required access to a computer or other electronic device other than the camera in my phone. 
With writing I need to sit and type away and it feels like a lot of effort for something that has only been getting the occasional flash of inspiration.It hasn’t helped that my tablet seems to short out or drain it’s battery rapidly. I should probably get it looked at, but it’s not high on my agenda.

What has been topping my agenda instead has been caring for Lady M in what has been a year of downright misery, disappointment, and ill-health; and I just haven’t had the energy or motivation to do much else aside from lose myself in books, games and drawing.

What I hope to start doing more regularly here is at least review some of the stories I’ve read. I hope that keeping the site going on that front will kick-start me into writing properly again at least. I certainly need to find some form of motivation – I’m feeling pretty hollowed out.

Applications for muses will of course be looked upon favourably. You may need either a shovel to dig me up, or a firearm to keep pointed at my head though; the ember’s pretty dim right now.

About Tim Maidment

Writer, House Husband, Library Person, Raconteur, Poly, Queer and Bon Vivant. You were expecting something simple?
This entry was posted in depression, Site News, writing and tagged , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

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