anniversary

Hot Water Bottle Time

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I’ve been staying over at boy s’ place the last couple of days to have some quiet time in celebration of five years of his being collared. WIth our collective health and it being a bit of a sparse time of month we didn’t do anything spectacular but instead enjoyed quiet time. We tidied the flat, watched YouTube videos, grabbed food, and had an early night.

I couldn’t let the event pass without some kind of gift or sign though. One of the things I’ve introduced the boy to is Dungeons and Dragons – and with that has come the dice goblin urge to gather as many shiny maths rocks as possible. He’s been keeping them in a box, but I know he’s been looking for a big partitioned dice bag to hold them in – so it was an easy choice to grab something that then gave plenty of room for expansion:

And so with all the hyper focus I love watching, he spent time grabbing sets out and dropping them in matching patterns or colour combinations to fill each of the sections of the bag. It is of course nowhere near being full, so he has now announced that he needs more – which will make birthday and christmas gifting much easier..!

The boy also struggles with feelings of worth sometimes – linked to various issues around the impact of mental health and other factors on how well he can engage – especially as part of our relationship. I felt that I really had no choice but to give him something to remind him when he’s feeling low, of how worthy he remains. So I got him a LARPing Mjolnir hammer that he can pick up to remind himself that he is of course worthy of love and care and attention.

That made him laugh.

Quiet Anniversary

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Eleven years ago, Lady M and I invited a bunch of people to join us at a castle for a party with a bit of paperwork attached. Memories of our wedding still put smiles on faces – and especially ours – all these years later.

We deliberately didn’t make any plans for today – but there were possibilities of book shops, coffee, maybe some wandering in fields or woods. Sadly, Lady M has had a horrible migraine today – and on top of that we ate some very rich food last night that very much disagreed with us both this morning.

So its been a quiet day. I’ve been reading some of the books I got for my birthday, as well as done some writing and sketching. I dropped the cub back round to boy s when he came round after school, and now I’m watching some videos on YouTube while waiting for our regular Friday Destiny Twitch stream.

We’ll do something to mark it properly at some point, I’m sure, but for now its just nice to sit and reminisce on the passage of years and how blessed we are where we are now.

Another Anniversary?

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Wednesday was the fourth anniversary of collaring boy s – in kink terms a form of commitment not unlike marriage – it was just a shame that both of us were too unwell to celebrate much of anything. I was staying over anyway so it was largely a day of napping in between doing the school run and doing some more work on the Amazon store.

We’ve decided instead to try and have a date night in the next week or so once payday has arrived and we’re in better health.

What we do all have to anticipate however is that we’ve got tickets for the Thorpe Park preview day on Saturday thanks to his working there. We’ve not been on any rollercoaster since before the first lockdown. Lady M has had her eye surgery since then too, so this will be the first time on them without glasses or contact lenses.

So, highs and lows and literal rollercoasters to come. Can’t wait.

Celebratory Meal

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Back before the days of plague we had a plan. Lady M and I were due to celebrate ten years of marriage and thought it would be amazing to get everyone we could back at the same venue for a knees up. Well, so much for that idea.

Instead we took a deep breath a day booked in for lunch, just the two of us, at The Hand And Flowers in Marlow. It, famously, is a pub with two Michelin stars. We make no secret about loving good food, and we’d been promising ourselves a fine dining experience but until now hadn’t taken the plunge.

A great joy of where we are in our careers is that we’ve variously built and rebuilt out of debt and career swerves over the years. We’ve been unemployed together, variously in and out of work and supporting each other, and I like to think that it’s helped us keep reasonably grounded about money as a result.

So we took a deep breath and then reminded ourselves it was a special occasion and we could afford it. And it was lovely. The staff were friendly and knowledgeable about the food and drink, the place is warm and comfortable, and the layout just irregular enough to feel cosy. And the food and drink was superb – we were very well fed and looked after.

A good way to celebrate an anniversary – and now we’ll have to plan for another excuse to return.

Three Years

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It’s been a strange journey of ups and downs in health and oddities, but I wouldn’t have it any other way. Its been three years since myr s accepted a collar from me, and cemented a place in our collective lives.

Despite the best efforts of covid-19, lockdown, and the general vagaries of life we’ve kept a strong if sometimes frustrated bond – the joys of living in separate cities and all that.

The collar is a mark of trust and partnership, not unlike a wedding band, but a little less subtle in its symbolism. Since the first chain mail one, I’ve since bought a more masculine one for them as their gender identity has evolved. There have so been some more casual ones for comfort or blending in.

I was vaccinated yesterday, another sign that we seem collectively to be moving towards all being able to see each other again. I love myr s deeply, and cannot wait.

9th Anniversary

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So, about this time nine years ago I think we were dancing, or possibly sharing left over cupcakes with friends while combat Morris Dancing was taking place, or maybe we were going back for thirds of the spit-roasted whole hog and encouraging the bar staff at the castle to take shots with us.

Whichever it was, it was fun and messy and nobody really cared too much except to keep a weather eye on the few kids in attendance. I suppose as a metaphor for our lives since then it’s not too far a stretch either.

Of course as we’re still in lockdown we’ve been a bit more limited this year as to how outrageous we can be, but a quiet day of hot beverages, TV shows, takeaway, and playing games is not a bad way to go.

We’ve exchanged gifts, we’ve curled up on the sofa, and watched the generally soggy day outside through the window. And the best bit? Neither of us is working in the morning and we can do it again if we like.

Nine years. Wow. It’s as if we like each other or something..!

Three Years

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Three years ago, our triad actually got together for the first time. There was laughter and silliness, pub visits, and shopping. Its a pattern that has continued and evolved ever since.

We’ve had ups and downs, good times and not so good times, but no more so than anyone else. Above all there’s love and support, understanding and honesty, and no small amount of teasing.

Even with the lockdown, these amazing people have stuck around, challenged, and cherished me. I’m a very lucky man.

Roll on the Weekend

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I’m working in a quieter library this week, so while there are fewer people around it does still make for a reasonably steady rate of use, even with people starting to twitch about potential illness. I’ve had two people this week mention they’re stocking up on books to read if they have to isolate themselves, and our numbers for events are down. So far though the very British shrug is being deployed.

That said, I am looking forward to having the weekend off, especially as I’m going to go see myr s for a couple of days. Getting away and letting the sea air clear the lungs a bit is definitely in order – and it’s also the second anniversary of my collaring them so there are some small presents to exchange which is always fun.

At least I’m generally aware of what my body’s usual range of complaints is so I’m not panicking when my fluctuating sugar levels give me sweats, or my sinuses complain when I shift stock and boxes around, disturbing dust in the process. Here’s to as calm a weekend as possible.

It’s An Anniversary

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Oh, yeah, by the way, today’s been the eighth wedding anniversary of myself and Lady M – eight years since we all gathered at Rowton Castle and had a massive party that also happened to have a wedding attached to it.

In typically disjointed fashion I’ve been back at work trying to remember passwords and catch up on all the many weird and wonderful things to have happened during my week away, while Lady M stayed home, ran things to the tip, and spent half the day chatting with the ex-Lady M about how proud we all are of the Charleesi.

By contrast, myr s has been struggling to find a way to style their new haircut in a way compatible with a favourite character in the Final Fantasy series – so I’ve been vaguely trying to remember what I used to spike my hair many moons ago when I had some.

The eighth anniversary is known as a Bronze anniversary, so as we always try to incorporate something of the relevant material in our gifts, I gave among other things a bronze knotwork pendant and a bronze keyring with the date on it – and Lady M gave me a miniature bronze armillary replica, and a set of bronze gaming dice from The Grinning Gargoyle

It’s as if she knows me or something

And then being soppy romantic buggers we sat on the sofa and caught up on some episodes of Altered Carbon before pottering around a bit more while I tinkered with laptops and desktop patching because we both have work again in the morning and celebratory silliness will have to be reserved until the weekend – where we’ll be catching up with Lord and Lady P for the first time in ages.

Meeting The Family

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This weekend was a celebration in my family of my parents’ Golden Wedding Anniversary – fifty years together and still teasing each other every day. The venue was a hotel near Box Hill in Surrey that we’ve used for various celebrations over the years.

The twist was that Lady S was also invited along, marking her introduction to my wider family in a somewhat wider scope than I’d ever anticipated.

I’d pushed for an invitation when they were first planning the event, partly to make the point that both Ladies M and S are important parts of my family and I wasn’t willing to sacrifice them. Given how my relatives are spread out around the place it made for an easier way to demonstrate that despite our unconventional relationship, no one involved in it had three heads.

I’m pleased to say that we had a wonderful evening celebrating my parents and catching up with each other. My family is generally one that gets more talkative and garrulous as the drink flows,and it’s safe to say that Lady S got a good look at where my storytelling comes from. We didn’t get to talk with everyone, but Lady S was happily welcomed right from the start, and our collective nerves rapidly settled.

Lovely food, good company, and a very late night as we opted to drive there and back rather than stay over – partly because of our nerves before hand in case things didn’t go well. And now… relax…